Last months holiday was, it seems; a little more difficult for me than I imagined it would be.
Too much time to ponder can be a dangerous thing. Even more dangerous when you don't come up with any satidfactory answers.
I appear inwardly to be so full of contradictions, while outwardly trying to maintain an elaborate deception to my self & the world at large.
I was in a situation I should have enjoyed , sailing around, meeting interesting folk, seeing new stuff. All good, but in a very masculine environment.
As I stated previously, I missed the girl. I can't fully explain the feeling. I felt I had put up a massive facade for a few weeks.
Not that it is not generally there, but it felt more intense than normal.
I think I just missed being me.
Returning to home & to work has been a bit of a blur.
The relief. The re-acceleration from almost total wind down.
...,but the absolute distraction has been intense also.
Can't get her out of my head.
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