...moving on

Monday, August 24, 2009

Moving on, but at what pace ?
One that suits me.
Slow.

I spent the evening, in public, in my home town. Not a mile from home, in a totally straight bar this past Friday. Walked to the pub that night , walked onto another with friends. Walked home & through my front door.
Pish pish , Say you. Big deal. Well maybe so.

Consider this though , at the age of 18 I was almost terminally shy. I hardly spoke to anyone in my latter teens. Only family & close friends.
I could not use a telephone, could not speak to strangers.
(I didn't own a telephone until 30 when friends came around one night & installed it)
Basically a bit of a wretched case.

For those that look at these psychological hangups from the out side they may seem so petty & incomprehensible. Believe me they are gut wrenchingly real.

University failed spectacularly for me as a result.

Lara lay mostly latent unit I reach 35. Insanity.

However, here we are some years later , I've forced myself to set aside my shyness, self consciousness, self doubt & fears.

I'm at a point where I can just about make it out in public without folding.

However that's me.
The point of this post was not to be about me, but rather about the friends I've made since Ive ventured out.
This week in particular has made me proud of them all.
One has made her first in roads en-route to transition, One has gone full time , One has taken a further step down the transition road.

They are moving on with their lives & I am immensely happy for them all.

This is probably not my path , but I can admire the confidence & commitment & self belief they all have.
It's one thing to know inside this is the right thing , it's another to make it happen.

Moving on at their own pace ,but leaving a positive wake.

1 comments:

Pandora Caitiff said...

Woo-hoo!

*pops party poppers*

That's awesome :)